Night

   So now I'm going to tell you about my night of mothering...more focused mothering than I have had to do in a long time. My kids are big now. Two of them are ladies and my baby is ten years old. So, I don't have to do much chasing around, or bathing or clothing of babes any more. Most of my mothering is on the phone with the ladies, or doing school with the baby, playing chess, sharing breakfast or a walk to the thrift store...trying to figure out a song on the piano...learning the countries of South America. I don't get much of the physical mothering that comes with babies or toddlers. Last night was a hint of the past though.
  Esme had a bad tummy ache and couldn't sleep, though she did try.  She came and got in bed with me and Aaron and snuggled for a bit, then decided to head back to her own bed. I kept hearing the rustling murmurs of a hurting girl so I got up and went to her bed. Cradled her in my arms for hours as she tried to sleep. Sitting up with my back against the wall holding her like the tiny babes I've held before. . Patting her back, petting her head...remembering a certain rocking chair, trying to sleep , while keeping a fussy baby happy...It is such tiring work.
    I am so thankful for the tummy ache last night. One more long snuggle, knowing that even if I couldn't make the tummy hurt go away, I could make my babe feel safe and loved. It's a feeling I still wish for when I am sick, those safe, strong, snuggling, mama arms.